In school we’re taught the 5 W’s (or 6 if you include “how”) – who, what, where, when, why and how. The hallmark of good story writing is to fill in all those blanks. If you’re going to write fiction, make sure you include all of those elements.
But, if you’re writing stories in your head for how you want your life to look, it’s best to leave out the 5 W’s. I know, goes against everything we were taught. Well, we’re breaking paradigms, right? To truly live a life in flow with ease and grace we have to write new stories. That means leaving out those elements.
When you’re in your head with anxiety or worry pay attention to what stories you are telling. Go back to that whiteboard I recommended in an earlier blog post by clicking here. See the story appearing on the white board. Are you asking things like, “WHEN will he call me?” “WHY doesn’t he like me?” “HOW will I get a new job?” “WHO is going to come into my life next?” “WHAT will my next job be?” If you are, those are your red flags. Those are the questions you want to erase.
I know, you’re thinking, why can’t I ask those questions? Well, you can, but more than likely they’ll keep you stuck in your head and lead to more questions that you can’t answer, which will serve you no positive purpose. They’ll keep you trapped on the hamster wheel of never-ending questions. Just like a hamster never goes anywhere on his wheel, neither will you.
To live the life you desire with ease and grace, it’s good to have new stories of what your life will look like. We just have to learn to write them differently. We’re all tempted to finish the story, to fill in the blanks, answer the 5 W’s. Forget what you learned in school. Just throw it out. Rip up the rule book!
It’s the UNIVERSE’S job to answer those questions, not yours! Truthfully, it’s taking a big load off your shoulders not to have to come up with those 5 W’s. But since we’re taught to answer them, it’s a habit. If you’re a “control freak” (hey, just sayin’, if you are, you can relate to that term) you think you need all the answers and now is better than later. If you tend to get anxious, having those answers makes you think you feel safe. (It’s an illusion BTW.) We think we need to answer them because that’s been ingrained in our heads our entire lives everywhere we look. We don’t, we really don’t.
The business world is a prime example of this. We’re taught to plan, strategize, organize, fill in all those blanks, check all the boxes. I never did and I’ve had plenty of business success, but that’s another story. The business world reinforces we need all the answers so we carry that type of thinking into our personal life.
You may have heard the expression, “Let Go and Let God.” Fill in the blank with another term over God if you like. What that expression is saying is “Let go and let the Universe (or God) do Its job.” You may be driving the car, sitting in the driver’s seat, but really the Universe is the GPS. It tells us where to go, how to get there, when to get there. It’s such a simple concept, but not always easy to practice because we want to hang on, to control because that’s what we’ve been taught. Attempting to have more control is like white-knuckling the steering wheel when you drive. That’s exhausting! The more you practice letting go, letting the Universe be your GPS, the easier it gets and the better you feel. You can sit back and enjoy the ride! I promise, been there, done it. If I can do it, so can you.
Huh, ok, I’ll let go of the wheel, Universe, you can steer. I’ll just sit in the driver’s seat and wait for your next direction. It may feel a little freaky because I’m giving up control, but I trust you, Universe. I know you have my back and you won’t lead me into a car crash.
It will feel a little bit like being back in Driver’s Ed, learning to drive. You’re just learning a new way to drive or live your life. You can control the gas and break because you always have control over how fast or how slow you want your progress to be. If you want to get to your destination, get what you desire out of life, worry-free, with the most fun, ease, grace, and success, then let go of the wheel! Stop trying to steer or be the back-seat driver. No one likes a back-seat driver so don’t do it to yourself! 😊
Doesn’t that feel lighter? More fun? Not so heavy like trying to force or stress over answers?
Replace the standard 5 W’s with one new W – WONDER!
Instead of trying to control or force the situation with the 5W’s, get into WONDER. For all you writers out there and those who aren’t, you have a new W. We are all writers of the stories in our head.
“I wonder what today will bring?”
“I wonder where I’ll meet him?”
“I wonder how I’ll make money today?”
“I wonder what I’ll be inspired with next?”