Have you ever walked away from a doctor’s appointment and said to yourself as you reached the parking lot, “Oh darn! I forgot to ask….?” I have. Many times. But not anymore.
Whenever you are seeking any form of help, just remember that it’s basically a buffet. There are many choices, but you don’t have to put them all on your plate.
We are NOT Victims – Even with Professionals!
We often forget that we are in the driver’s seat of our own lives because society tends to ingrain in us the victim or disempowered mentality. As such, we forget that we can speak up, that we can make a different choice than the norm or that we even have choices at all. And that not all choices work for us, particularly when it concerns our health, mental or physical.
When we visit a doctor many of us are conditioned to do exactly as the doctor says. Do what he says, take what he orders, like a robot, no questions asked. Sometimes doctors give us medical explanations that we can’t follow so we get lost in our own appointment. As I’ve told my son many times, YOU are in charge. You get to ask the questions; you get to decide whether you agree with the doctor or not. You get to decide if you want to take that prescription or not. And most importantly, you get to dictate how the appointment goes.
The same is true with therapy or teachers or healers or anything else. The therapist may be a trained professional but maybe you don’t agree with what they’re saying or maybe they’re belaboring a point too long. Maybe they aren’t covering what you wish to discuss. To solve these issues, lead the appointment yourself. Use them for what you are paying them for – advice, recommendations, professional knowledge. If they don’t provide those things, ask. If they aren’t complete in their explanations, ask. This is your appointment that you are paying for so lead the discussion.
It’s the doctor’s job to keep the appointment on track. That’s why you often feel rushed. They don’t give you enough time to ask questions; they just tell you what they want you to know. Too many years I walked away from a doctor appointment not getting all the information I was seeking because I forgot to ask questions! Or I forgot an important question. I let them tell me what they wanted me to know, then escort me out the door. I was in the passenger seat, not the driver’s seat.
Ask Questions – it’s Ok!
It’s my advice that any time you go to see a professional of any kind (even a psychic!) have a list of questions and points to discuss so that you can direct the appointment and get your questions and concerns answered. Write down or record their answers if you’re concerned that you’ll forget. It’s helpful anyway so that you can review what was said and see if it makes sense to you.
Just because a professional gives you advice or recommendations, doesn’t mean that you have to take it. You have many choices.
Something I learned a long time ago is that not everything is good for everyone. In my ignorance when I was younger, I assumed all things are equal. All doctors are equal. All professionals are equal. They are not. I believed this because my parents took me to their doctor, their dentist. They liked them, so I must too. I didn’t have a choice in the matter. Do what they say, believe what they tell you.
It wasn’t until I was an adult that I realized, hey, I don’t care for this doctor or I don’t agree with his recommendations. I’m going to get a different one. Just because a doctor is a professional doesn’t mean that you click with him. In school I’m sure you had your favorite teacher. Why? Because not all teachers are alike. Some are friendlier, nicer, explain things better. Not all professionals are the same.
It’s Ok Not to Like Them
It’s ok to have preferences. It’s ok not to like a doctor or therapist or any other helper professional. Know that you have choices. You can change doctors. You can fire your therapist. Or just manage your time with them to get YOUR needs met. You are paying them so take the lead.
This may seem obvious to you, but many people don’t realize this, especially older generations. They were trained to do as the doctor says, no questions asked. My mom is that way. Now that she’s elderly we always make sure she has someone go into the appointment with her to help her. Remind her to ask her questions or we ask for her and write down the answers so that she can digest them later.
My son as a young adult didn’t realize that he could ask questions or direct the appointment or pick a different doctor. I had to educate him. It’s your body, your mind and your money. Therefore, you call the shots. They are trained to provide information a certain way but that doesn’t mean that you can’t ask your questions. Lead the appointment. Get your value.
Pick What Works, Disregard the Rest
That’s why help is like a buffet – pick what works for you, disregard the rest. If you don’t like the doctor, don’t put it on your plate so to speak. If he didn’t address your concerns, pick something else from the buffet, meaning bring it up. Mention your concerns. Ask questions.
It costs you more money to make another appointment just to ask something you forgot or were too shy to bring up. This is for you. It’s ok to ask. Even if they rush you or don’t make you feel good about it, ask anyway. Or just leave and get a new doctor that makes you feel more comfortable!
Over the years I have changed doctors many times. I’m no longer shy about it. If they aren’t meeting my needs or we don’t click, I move on. Why waste your time and money not getting your needs met? Just because they are a professional doesn’t mean they are good for everyone. That’s what took me years to unravel! Like many people, I followed their lead, not asking questions, just listening to what he said then watch him leave while I was still processing the information and sometimes later regretting that I followed his recommendations. What was I thinking? I wasn’t. I was just following their lead, doing as they said.
You have a right to know, so ask. If you don’t feel comfortable asking, reflect on the situation. Is it you? Are you too shy? Too unsure of yourself to ask or take the lead? Or did they rush you out the door? Are they dismissive? Did they say something offensive like, “That’s a stupid question.” I kid you not, a doctor once said that to my son. We don’t go there anymore needless to say. Just because they are doctors, I learned, doesn’t mean they are nice people. Sometimes their egos get in the way.
If you didn’t click with the doctor or any other professional, then go back to the buffet. Pick another one. That’s why we have buffets – to give us many choices. That’s why we have many doctors – many choices. Pick the one you feel most comfortable with. It’s ok, really, it is. It’s your health and your money. Choose you.
Are you unsure about your doctor or other professional? Is he really helping you? Not sure what to do? Ask your best friend, your intuition. It will know. It will guide you. It will help you identify what to deal with now and what not to…if you ask it!
If you want to learn how to listen to it, how to talk to it and how to trust it by CLICKING
HERE. I developed this easy-to-follow online course because people like you asked me to.
Once you start listening to your intuition, you’ll be amazed how much your life clicks into place. Then you can truly start enjoying yourself. CLICK HERE to find out more!
