Don’t Base the Future on the Past
Have you said any of these things? “I always pick the wrong guy so I will again,” or “I always screw up, so I’ll screw up again” or “I’ll never be successful because so far I’m not.” It’s human nature to look to the past to predict the future. Using the past to predict the future can be a slippery slope. The past isn’t always accurate, especially if you want to see a different result.
Just because you did something a certain way at one time doesn’t mean you’ll do it that way again. When you really look at that statement, you can see the flaws in the logic. You aren’t the same person you used to be, even a minute ago. And especially not if you want to make a change.
If you want a different result, you know what they say, you have to take different actions. If you’re taking different actions than you did in the past, then you’re not repeating the past. Just because you “always” attract the wrong guy, but are doing it differently this time, does not mean you’ll attract the “wrong” guy again. Or fill in the blank with anything else you desire.
Do You Really Want to Repeat the Past?
If the past hasn’t worked out so well for you, then why would you want to repeat it?
If you know the past didn’t work to produce the results you want, then you’re probably open to making sure it doesn’t happen again by making some changes. Change your attitude, your mindset, your actions. Different actions lead to different results. Or maybe the end result is the same, but how you got there makes all the difference.
For example, there are many ways to get somewhere. You can take the highways, tollways or the back roads. You’re still reaching your destination, just how you’re getting there is different.
The same concept applies to get what you want in any area of your life. You can still meet a guy online if you like online dating. To meet the “right” guy, try something different. Change up your profile, change how you respond to inquiries. The method is the same – you’re still doing online dating – you’re just changing up how you do it. Those little tweaks could make all the difference to find the “right” guy.
New Way, New Result
Now that you’ve changed your past (how you were approaching online dating) you can have a new future. It no longer means that you won’t find the right guy because you made some changes to your method. If it still doesn’t work, make some more changes. As with anything, we often have to make adjustments to see what works best. Just don’t get stuck in the rut of “I’ve never met a guy online before, so why would I now?” That’s using the past to predict the future – a future that you don’t want!
For those that see patterns it’s easy to draw the conclusion that since you did it that way several times, it makes sense you’ll do it that way again.
If you haven’t worked through the issues that caused you to do something a certain way, then yes, the past can be repeated in the future. For example, if you don’t feel that you have what it takes to be a success, then that’s a mindset or belief issue. Taking different actions will produce the same result until you change the way you look at things.
You can spend all kinds of money on success boosting courses, listen to meditations, read books on the subject, etc., but if you don’t believe you’ll be a success, then no amount of time or money will change that. You may be taking new actions – a new method or process – but if you still believe you’ll fail, then guess what? It’s highly likely that you won’t reach your goal.
If I Gained Weight Before, Am I Going to Gain it Again?
Let’s say you went on a diet in the past and lost weight. Then as the years went by, it crept back on. Then you go on another diet and lost weight again. Now you’re nervous that while you accomplished your goal and look great, you’ll repeat the past. The logic is easy to buy – you lost, gained and lost again so why not gain again?
Because this time not only will you learn new eating habits (assuming that’s what you want), you’ll believe you can keep it off. You believe in yourself not to stray. You won’t re-visit the junk food aisle. Or if you do, it won’t happen often. That’s using the past to set a course for a new future – this time I will not gain it back. I have new eating habits and a new attitude!
Doesn’t that feel better? More confident?
You know that no matter what, you will not gain it back. You will do your best to feel good about your accomplishment. So good that you won’t want those chips or cheese or additional glasses of wine. How’s that for using a new method to gain a new result? Sounds like success to me!
How do I Create a New Future?
How do you figure out how to do things differently this time?
You can do the ole trial and error method. That always helps. See what works and what doesn’t. What doesn’t work, don’t repeat it. If you don’t repeat the same method, the chances of a new result are really good. Done.
You can get ideas from other sources – research, googling, asking friends, reading books etc. Keep in mind that what worked for someone else may not work for you. So how do you know if it will? Trial and error. Try it out, throw it out if it doesn’t produce the results you want.
Or, you can ask your super power that I keep talking about. Your intuition. Before you start something new like a new diet or a new way to date, ask your intuition if it will work for you. If you get a yes, great, go with it.
Then you do the diet, lose the weight, then the fear kicks in of re-gaining it like you did before. Now what? Make adjustments like we said above. How do you know which ones are the best for you? Ask your intuition. Maintenance can look all different ways. You need the way that works best for you. Your intuition will know that and never steer you wrong!
Apply your intuition to everything. Will this new dating method work for me? Will this new success course help me achieve my goals? Forget what the past said. Create a new future. Create it with a new way of doing things. Consult your intuition for the best course of action for you.
After all, it IS your super power! It knows what’s best for you. Better than any book, course or teacher.
If you want to learn more about developing your intuition, contact me.