Getting out of Victim Mode

Probably every one of us has been a victim at some point in our lives even if it was being a victim of credit card fraud vs being abused by a parent or a spouse.

If you were a victim in an abusive relationship it can take hard work to get past it. If you were a victim of something that didn’t happen for an extended period of time such as credit card fraud, that is quicker to recover from. Sadly, fraud is becoming more commonplace these days.

In the past I was a victim of fraud. It feels violating to say the least. When it happened to me, I was remarkably calm. On some higher level I knew there was no reason to get mad, scream or shout. It happened, move on, repair the damage. The same night it happened I sent forgiveness to my perpetrators.

Why would I do that?

Forgive Them

Because one way to get out of being a victim is forgiveness. While you can’t change the fact that it happened, you can change how you continue to react to it. If you can forgive your perpetrator, it makes it much easier to move on. It opens a space where you can heal. Otherwise, you can get stuck in anger, grief, hatred, etc. and then you can’t move on.

When I was growing up, I was emotionally abused by my dad. It took me well into my adulthood to forgive him. I was glad I did because not only did it give us a smoother relationship, it helped me to release the anger that I was harboring towards him for many years. By the time he passed, I had no regrets because I had forgiven him and cleared things up between us. While you can forgive someone after they pass, it’s more meaningful to do it while they’re alive because you can repair your relationship and reap the benefits. Plus, they’re there to talk it through with if you choose.

We Signed Up for It

For those of us that have lived with abuse we chose it so we could experience it, learn from it and overcome it. Yes, that’s right. We sign up for the life we have before we incarnate, even the icky things. Life is all one big school, basically. We come here to learn.

Even something like being a victim of fraud or other type of crime we sign up for. We chose on some level to experience it.  When I was a victim of fraud, it felt like the Universe was telling me, “You’re not over this victim stuff yet! Clear this up!” Remove the victim vibration from your frequency.

How do we do that?


There are many things we can do to stop being a victim such as learning to stand up for ourselves. The key as I said, is forgiveness. Forgive your perpetrator but also forgive yourself. Even if you were a victim of something you could have prevented (like I shouldn’t have walked home alone in the dark to avoid getting mugged), don’t beat yourself up over it. It happened. You’re alive, you’re safe.

Even though I didn’t like being a victim of fraud (like, who does?), the damage was minimal. Perhaps the damage would’ve been more had I not forgiven them so quickly. While I’ll never know for sure, I felt better forgiving them. It allowed me to move on easier. Getting caught up in anger or the “Why me?” reaction serves no purpose. Sure, you can allow yourself some of that, but after a while it’s time to move on because that doesn’t help. It only slows you down and gets you stuck in that emotion and thought process.

For more traumatic events I realize forgiving your perpetrator takes time and isn’t easy. It’s a process. It took me many years to forgive my dad. Knowing I signed up for that also helped me to move on because it took me out of the questioning it mode. That way I didn’t linger on questions like, “Why me?”

Not everyone may believe in signing up for things in advance or reincarnation and that’s ok. It happens to be my belief and a widely held belief. No one is right or wrong when it comes to beliefs. They just are. You can choose one over the other. Knowing that you chose these things takes the sting out of it and takes the focus off of being a victim.

Don’t Dwell on It

We know how the law of attraction works: what you think about, you bring about. So, if you focus on being a victim, guess what will happen? You’ll manifest more situations in which you’re a victim. It’s the Universe’s way of pounding it into your head that you need to let go of victimhood. If you don’t, the victim situations will keep happening and may become more severe.

Just when you thought you were done with it, clearly you weren’t since another victim situation popped up.  Every time you experience victimhood again, look at it as a new chance to let it go. There’s another layer there that needs to be released. Keep peeling back the layers to get to the core. When you get there, let the Universe know that you are done experiencing this. You are ready to let it go once and for all.

How to Let Victimhood Go

Visualization is a very powerful tool since the mind can’t tell the difference between real or imagined. That’s the huge benefit to us. Visualize yourself standing strong. See yourself as clever and wise so you don’t fall prey to any schemes. Imagine yourself strong and assertive so that you can’t be abused again.

Just like you can set a google alert, set an alert with your Higher Self. Have an alert go off any time you’re getting close to being a victim again. How will you know? It will come in through your intuition. That gut feeling will notify you. Or the whispers you hear will tell you. However you receive your intuition, you’ll know. It’s your reminder to change your vibration and your behavior so you aren’t abused. Make up and use a mantra. Something like, “I am safe. I am strong. All is well.” Repeat that whenever you think you are coming close to being a victim again. It’s your reminder to stay in your power. Even if it’s something small like being ripped off in the grocery store. Just remember: “I am safe. I am strong. All is well.” By believing you are safe, strong and all is well, the chances of that being true are much higher. And so it is.

If you’re life isn’t working out so great and you want it to get better, listening to your intuition to guide you is the key. Find out how to identify your intuition, how to listen to it, how to talk to it and how to trust it by CLICKING HERE.

Once you start listening to your intuition, you’ll be amazed how well your life works out! Then you can truly get what you want in life. CLICK HERE to find out more!


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